Have you ever asked yourself some of the big questions? Sitting down in a quiet place, stillness surrounding you, maybe a dim light somewhere to bring forth a nuance about the atmosphere. You might take a deep breath to relieve some of the stress from the day. You might look around and notice small details within the area you occupy that have never been noticed before. Becoming more aware of who you are and where you are. And you begin to clear your mind… slowly moving away from the hectic nature of common living.
To ask yourself a question.
Finally the question reveals itself from the depths of your mind, one that has been poking for awhile but never hard enough to worry about. The question takes it’s place at the forefront of your thinking and captures all of your energy for the moment.
Why do I believe?
That became my question. Answers like, because I grew up in the church or because the bible says so just don’t do it for me. There has to be more. In some way the God I believe in has to be my God. In some ways he has to feel real, he has to reign true, he has to be significant to me; he must go beyond words into an area of tangible actions. And… and beyond me, I think my God has to be significant to everybody else on the planet and everything else in existence. And so I sit with a question.
Then answers come flooding in to remind me why. As if the Holy Spirit moved through the room with a gentle whisper of hope and inspiration. I came to remember why I believe.
I believe because I watched a kid who once had no social skills become a leader in his church at the age of 17. I believe because I watched a kid who once was in remedial reading become an avid reader in search for ideas and life. I believe because a young man who once was addicted to pornography now can begin to see the real beauty of God’s created woman. I believe because I watched the tears of a young woman reliving her childhood abuse become the motivation for her to become a counselor and peace maker. I believe because of the power silence and stillness can have on a small group of three college kids laying on a floor thinking of dreams, loves, and heartaches. I believe because of a broken heart and tear stained cheek becoming a motivated soul and provoked activist. I believe because of the whiteness a brand new sheet of snow brings to my campus. I believe because of trees staggering miles over head. I believe because of beautiful butterflies tasting their first flight through the crisp air.
I believe because these are all things that I cannot do.
At the moment my belief lies in mystery of a God who is making things new.