To Me, To Live

A Question

Have you ever asked yourself some of the big questions? Sitting down in a quiet place, stillness surrounding you, maybe a dim light somewhere to bring forth a nuance about the atmosphere. You might take a deep breath to relieve some of the stress from the day. You might look around and notice small details within the area you occupy that have never been noticed before. Becoming more aware of who you are and where you are. And you begin to clear your mind… slowly moving away from the hectic nature of common living.

To ask yourself a question.

Finally the question reveals itself from the depths of your mind, one that has been poking for awhile but never hard enough to worry about. The question takes it’s place at the forefront of your thinking and captures all of your energy for the moment.

Why do I believe?

That became my question. Answers like, because I grew up in the church or because the bible says so just don’t do it for me. There has to be more. In some way the God I believe in has to be my God. In some ways he has to feel real, he has to reign true, he has to be significant to me; he must go beyond words into an area of tangible actions. And… and beyond me, I think my God has to be significant to everybody else on the planet and everything else in existence. And so I sit with a question. 

Then answers come flooding in to remind me why. As if the Holy Spirit moved through the room with a gentle whisper of hope and inspiration. I came to remember why I believe.

I believe because I watched a kid who once had no social skills become a leader in his church at the age of 17. I believe because I watched a kid who once was in remedial reading become an avid reader in search for ideas and life. I believe because a young man who once was addicted to pornography now can begin to see the real beauty of God’s created woman. I believe because I watched the tears of a young woman reliving her childhood abuse become the motivation for her to become a counselor and peace maker. I believe because of the power silence and stillness can have on a small group of three college kids laying on a floor thinking of dreams, loves, and heartaches. I believe because of a broken heart and tear stained cheek becoming a motivated soul and provoked activist. I believe because of the whiteness a brand new sheet of snow brings to my campus. I believe because of trees staggering miles over head. I believe because of beautiful butterflies tasting their first flight through the crisp air. 

I believe because these are all things that I cannot do.

At the moment my belief lies in mystery of a God who is making things new.

Let Us Journey

There are things in life that I hate. Things that leave my stomach twisting and instill in me a violent urge to punch something.

I hate when people don’t think they are beautiful.

I hate when people aren’t reminded of their importance.

I hate when people feel inferior to others.

I hate when people tell themselves lies.

All of these things seem like a loss of who God is and who YOU are. God is good. He is love. He is power. He is creator. He is a father of grace and mercy. He offers life. God reveals a reality more awesome than we can fully imagine. This reality is the one we are all invited to journey toward. Discipleship then,  in my mind, is a journey toward this reality in which Jesus showed us the fullness of. A reality that can only be truly pursued through intimate fellowship with the Son of life.

A journey toward seeing ALL as beautiful.

A journey toward using words to build others up.

A journey toward equality in love.

A journey toward truth.

This journey can be rough, it can get hard, it might be a little messy at times. I can attest to this. I have royally screwed up time and time again, and every time I hate it. 

But I get up and journey on. Now knowing another way of how not to do things on the adventure.

May we become a people with a purpose, a goal, an understanding; may we become a people on a journey.

Not Alone, Just Single

I think being single might be cool. Let me rephrase that, being single is cool. I have to say it in that way because I have never tried anything else. Since day one I have been single. Never been in a relationship with a special someone, never had my first kiss, never had that romantic outing to go stargazing or fireworks watching, I have always been single. Only a hand full of times have I even slow danced with a woman; seriously, I could count the instances on my fingers. But I don’t want to die alone.

And this is what the world tells me will happen if I don’t get my game on soon. 18 years are gone, my time is running thin. I need to start getting some practice before I get left out and forever become the awkward third wheel. But I don’t even know how to ask a girl out, and talking to one that I am attracted to, haha, I suck. Is there a possibility that I will never date anyone? Ever.

So, to combat this singleness we have web sites like E-Harmony, Match.com, and Christian Mingle. We have youtube videos instructing young men on how to talk to girls. We have colleges (Not all, Just mine) hosting speed dating games, their own mingle sites, and cheap date nights all in an effort to defeat singleness. This, all in the name of togetherhood; finding a soul mate to complete us. And right in the middle of the conversation we have the voice of the church. Churches with Marriage sermons about waiting for the “one” and church sponsored single nights (A.K.A hookup nights), so we sense the church is convinced finding a someone is important as well.

It seems so normal to get a wife and have a family. Go to church every Sunday, talk to your kids about Jesus, family game nights, romantic valentines day dinners each year; now that is what adult life is about, isn’t it?

Church, what if singleness is a good thing? No one ever told Jesus he should get a wife to be happy. I never heard of anyone preaching to Paul about being patient in his quest to find a wife. Did anyone ever advise Mother Theresa to get a husband? 

So, I propose a question: Have we, just maybe, put marriage in a place that it shouldn’t be and passively lowered singleness to a place it shouldn’t be? Do we need to change our focus?

Jesus was counter cultural. He loved the poor, forgave the whores, invited the thieves, and ultimately died for a people who mostly hated him. In his life Jesus introduced a way of living that magnificently revealed a beautiful reality beneath the broken falsehoods of the world. He brought heaven to earth, he busted in courageously pulling heaven down with him, and with every miracle, every word, every step, with every breath Jesus showed us the reality of life in his kingdom. At it’s core this kingdom is characterized by love and togetherness. Jesus showed a reality of love. 

Jesus was single.

Then I look to Paul. This dude wrote at least 30 percent of the new testament. He was single. Actually he spoke on this too, yeah he directly addressed this singleness concept. What did he say? Did he advise us all to wait for the love of our lives to arrive one day in a horse drawn chariot? Not quite. He says,  ”He who marries does well, and he who refrains does even better.” (check 1 Corinthians 7… just read it all). Why would he say this?

Let me offer one reason, our focus as Christians is love. Jesus commanded that we love God and love others as ourselves. He instituted a new way of thinking where love reigns supreme over all of creation and infiltrates the deep brokenness and confronts the deep pain of this world. He never urges his followers to look for a someone, but he certainly demands that we love those who feel no love. This, my friends, is the journey of a Christian. 

We don’t have to worry about being single. I would suggest we should actually long to be forever single. Singleness does not equal alone. Some of the most connected and influential people in all of history where single.

So, is there a possibility I will never date anyone? Man, I sure hope so. Right now, sitting and typing, I actually feel a buzz of excitement; a feeling of hope and optimism as I long to be with God and work under him with others, loving a broken world of broken hearts and broken lives. Showing life to things that seem dead, allowing the reality of light to invade the shadows of darkness.

But I surely won’t die alone.

Beautiful Duct Tape

At a get together type deal with some friends from student min we started talking about lawnmowers. Racing, tricking them out, lawnmower death-matches, we pretty much covered it all. We also talked about fixing them. One of my friends somewhat jokingly said, “never take your lawnmower to sears.” We looked at him and asked why. In which he responded something like, “Sears you pay a lot of money for something we could do on our own. Besides, the duct tape and bungee chords holding the lawnmower together give it some character.” Despite the humor I think that there is truth here.

There is this desire within me that wants me to always do things right. Always I want to do things in a way that is efficient and effective. And for me, If I can’t do it in that way I either won’t even try or I will let someone else do it for me. Oftentimes if I lack a straightforward answer I give up. I quit. I need a right answer.

What happens when the answer isn’t as clear? What happens when the answer isn’t quite tangible? When black and white begin to blur in the constructs of our mind.

Abram was pretty well off at the moment. He had a lot of silver, a lot of livestock, and a lot of gold. We are told in Genesis 13 though, that Abram called out to the Lord. Most likely in praise but I can’t help but wonder; what if he wanted an answer. His nephew, Lot, had a good bit of stuff as well. The scriptures tell us that they had so much stuff they couldn’t even live together, there wasn’t room. This is kind of a problem. On top of that, Abram’s herdsman didn’t get along with Lot’s herdsman. I can only imagine the tension felt in the situation. Maybe Abram’s cry was a “What should I do?” 

Regardless of what this call was for, something catches my attention.

God doesn’t respond. No talking from God, no straightforward answer to the problem is given.

Oddly enough Abram seems fine with that, he handles the situation without a black and white resolution. He splits up the land giving his brother first dibs, very simple and very honorable.

So, essentially Abram uses some duct tape and bungee chords. There was no clear cut answer, God did not speak directly from what we read. Abram had to figure it out. But, it wasn’t that God wasn’t there, I think it was more so that God knew Abram could handle it. Answers aren’t always clear, but God is always there. 

The faith in a God who is always there is what guides us to act in confidence and humility.

Maybe when we find ourselves in a tough situation dealing with brokenness and conflict what God really wants us to do is to try out some duct tape and bungee chords, he wants us to have faith something good is happening.

I think I’m going to start adding a little character to my lawnmower.

You Are Gifted

So I was talking to a friend of mine recently and I got frustrated. Not mad, not angry, just frustrated. What I need to say right here is simple. We have all been created in the image of God. Something about us is profoundly beautiful. The creative hands of God, the fingerprints of the master artist are all over everything we are, right to the core. He has gifted us with talents, passions, skills, interests; in his immeasurable creativity he has crafted a person who is uniquely you. To never share who you are with the world, to never show others the creativity, the talents, the interests, and passions that God has woven into your existence is nothing short of an incredible injustice to the world around you. My friend has talents that have never been shared with the world. Albeit, I know the talents this friend has been gifted with and have voiced my opinion, to share the gift with everyone, but they are too afraid to express their creativity and uniqueness with a world that encourages/requires conformity.

What happens then, the Kingdom of God is deprived of an inspiring talent. God has imparted part of himself, part of his own creativity to us, and when we share this creativity with others essentially we are celebrating a characteristic of God; we bring glory to his name, we worship. We all have gifts. What frightens me most is when gifted people hide those gifts. I am worried that many gifts may sit within your soul never to be opened. They will stay locked up in the depths of who you are waiting to be unwrapped, released, cultivated, honed, they are waiting to be realized. God’s creativity is waiting to be realized in you.

Do you like to write? Inspire others. Do you like to sing? Sing beautifully  Do you like to make movies? Imagine a new world. Do you like to act? Make others laugh and cry. Do you like to build? Construct a monument like no other. Do you like to help? Start a movement.

You are gifted. Share your gifts. Hone the image of God within you, show his creativity through your life

Create something new.